Thursday, June 19, 2008

smiling on the outside

In case the video isn't streaming correctly, you may also view it here on YouTube.

If you haven't already watched the above video, I encourage you to do so. It conveys my feelings better than I can.

My blogging friend Nancy, of More Than Enough, posted this video along with some very personal feelings she experienced during a very hard time in her life (post here). It reminded me of when I experienced some of the same feelings she described.

There was a time when I felt as though I was in an emotional vacuum. I was dealing with heartache and grief and it was getting the best of me. During that time, I felt like I was sleepwalking - just going through the motions of everyday life. I remember going to church one Sunday morning and after the service, standing amongst 100 or so people, I had to smile and make small talk all the while feeling so empty and alone. I just wanted to hide in some corner and cry, but that is not what was expected from me at the time and in that place.

As I stood there, with the smile plastered on my face, I looked around at the other people, who were also smiling and making small talk. I found myself wondering how many of them might be feeling the same way I was. How many of them were dealing with something painful? What struggles were they experiencing but didn't let any of it show? How many tormented souls put on the "I'm okay" mask so the rest of the world doesn't know how broken they really are?

I had never seen or thought about other people in this way before. Later, when my own heart was healed, I realized God had given me a gift. He gave me an insight and I believe He's asked me not to just look at a person from what I can see on the outside, but what might be going on on the inside.

And from my experience, when we start looking inside instead of strictly the outside, we come to learn more about ourselves and realize that we all need to be ministered to.


MoziEsmé said...

Thanks for the reminder to look beyond appearances. I think a lot of us have gone through what you described.

Lori said...

That brought tears to my eyes.
That was a great reminder to be considerate of how others might be feeling.
It reminds me of that bible verse that says: look not only to your interests but also to the interest of others.

Lori said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Barb said...

Beautifully expressed. Your life reflects the gift God gave you during that time. God is sooo good.

Melissa said...

Ah... you don't know how much I needed this reminder today. I went to a women's conference awhile back and the speaker said, "You can never know ALL of a person's story." It's so true. Everyone has a story... and we don't know what they may be going through. Thanks.

Mam said...

Diana, you have really expanded beautifully on what I was trying to convey. "for everything there is a season."

Amber said...

WOWOWOWOW, such power in your wards...and the video. THANK you for the beautiful reminder!

Penless Thoughts said...

Such words of wisdom, Diana. We are all there!!!!

Mary@notbefore7 said...

Diana, So been there myself too. I can't watch the video sound, but will.

I remember actually being told "to get over" the pain I was feeling by Christians, making it all the harder. Sometimes the words of "just pray about it" don't do it. I felt so empty and alone.

Thankfully God had a plan and pulled me back toward Him and filled me with His goodness.

Penless Thoughts said...

Diana, Thank you so much for your prayers. I KNEW you would understand :o)

Dee said...

i don't like to show my feelings to people I don't know and sadly I don't know much people in church. Just a few aquaintences and that's it.
Glad you found your gift!


Maisie said...

That made me cry - a good kind of cry. What a great thing for us to think about. We are all going through something. Even a smile to someone could make a difference. I'm glad that I got to see this video.

Momma Roar said...

(getting caught up on older posts)

WOW! What an amazing video! What a great reminder to think about others instead of always thinking about ourselves!!!

Thanks for sharing this!