Sunday, February 21, 2010

fear not

My biggest fear....
three little (but powerful) words....
you have cancer

I am not one to live my life in fear, but if I had to name a real fear I have, and have had for a long time, I wouldn't even have to think about it. It would be the chance of having cancer.

So imagine where my mind went and what I've been living with for the last couple of weeks after being told that there was unusual calcification found on my last mammogram film. Actually, I ran the gamut of emotions. Not only fear, but worry, denial, and anxiety. But after the initial onslaught of negative emotions hit, and threatened to take over, I came to a place where I could rely on such emotions as peace and hope.

I was able to get to this place because of my trust in God and knowing He was there with me no matter what the outcome was (and is) to be. I learned a long time ago that worrying doesn't accomplish anything positive - only negative, so why worry over what may never happen and something I didn't have any control over. I also had a lot of prayers and support which was of great comfort to me.

I had a second [magnifying] mammogram and ultrasound done that determined I needed a biopsy. A biopsy was done and the results came back negative for cancer - yay God! But did show that I have something called Atypical Ductal Hyperplasia (ADH). In the next couple of weeks I will have to have an MRI and then a surgical procedure to remove the tissue that is affected.

I'm not looking forward to this but I am soooooo thankful that I'm dealing with this instead of cancer. And with God at my side, and holding my hand, I know I can get through anything.

Here's the piece of scripture that I've held on to through all of this....
"For I am the LORD, your God,
who takes hold of your right hand
and says to you, Do not fear;
I will help you." Isaiah 41:13 NIV

12 comments:

MightyMom said...

glad for the good result!

let me know when your surgery will be.

Momma Roar said...

Oh wow, Diana. I'm so sorry you had to have those weeks of waiting for the results. I went through this with my mom 13 years ago, and she did indeed have cancer. But, I'm happy to say that she's been cancer free since her surgery. And I rejoice with you that your results were negative for cancer.

Thank you for sharing this with us. Please keep us updated so that we can support you our prayers!

{{hugs}}

Just Mom said...

It is, indeed, a scary word.

I'm thankful that the results were negative, but I'm positive had it been otherwise you would have found the strength to cope.

I'll keep you in my prayers.

Mommy, I'm Home said...

So sorry you're going through this, Diana, but SO, SO glad it's not cancer. If you need anything, just send me an email. You're not so far away that I couldn't come hold your hand if you need me to...

Karen said...

Diana, I'm so sorry for the anxiety and worry that you've been through. And elated that you had a good outcome with the tests!

Thank you for sharing, so that I can keep you in my prayers, and also for sharing your faith journey. I gain strength hearing stories such as yours.

Jamey said...

I'm so happy for you that it came back cancer free, but so sorry that you had to go through that waiting and fear! We have a lot of cancer in my family and that is one of my worst fears as well. I have also learned not to worry about what I can't control or change and just try not to think about it. God follows us through every journey and we have to remember that and rely on it. I'm glad you got good news and I hope that the procedures you do need go well!

Just Breathe said...

That is very good news. I will be praying for you. God is good.

kailani said...

What a scare! I'm so sorry for what you have to go through but I'm also glad to hear you don't have Cancer! Whew!

mom said...

It is so awesome to know that God holds our hand lovingly and tightly through the difficult times. You chose a powerful scripture to hold in your heart and mind.

Maxine said...

Wow, Diana, so glad all is well. I have a friend who just had the same thing and her biopsy came back neg. too. Thank the Lord. It's amazing how something like this comes up and how the Lord gives us strength for the moment, whatever that moment is.

Sis said...

So glad you posted this so that many more can pray for you in the days ahead and be additional support. Praise God for the good news and for providing you with the peace, faith and hope you need. What a blessing!
Love you!
Sis

J-ME said...

rejoicing with you at the good news!
Thanks for visiting my blog and for your prayers! Our trip has made it into the local paper!